happiness only lasted for one day.

i have this habit of not eating whenever i'm alone. so i'm angry with my aunt for leaving me alone these few days! rawr. ppl have their own life so i think they couldnt even be bothered with me. ytd the new goods shipped in alrdy. unpacking and storing them into respective places is tiring. i still have to carry all the belts up to uncle. its heavy! and i didnt eat for the whole except for the curry puff that uncle bought. finish unpacking two BIG boxes and there's left 4 small boxes. i hope ice will finish packing today. i pray! den probably when i go back tmr there wont be anything left to do. alumni practise is starting again tmr. 9 to 1! gosh. and we really joined! whatever. and i really need to stop thinking whenever i'm outside. coz i have done sth so so wrong. rawr. so guilty. the silver anklet cost 45bucks and i actually sold it for 22! and i didnt even include the string. shit. lucky my uncle dunno. what am i thinking. i'm hired to help him earn money but i actually caused him to lose money now. all the things cost $52.50 and i only charged that guy for $27.50 wth!

i'm seeing EILEEN TAY today!! i miss her so much!

'what if' is a nice song!
i dunno what to say but it really hurts so much. i'm the one at fault okie. i'm the one who is wrong. i'm a bad person. but do i need to suffer so much? i dun wan to feel so lonely again. it felt sucky to eat alone. it's still the same tmr.

Here I stand alone with this weight upon my heart and it will not go away
In my head I keep on looking back
Right back to the start
Wondering what it was that made you change
Well I tried but I had to draw the line
And still this question keeps on spinning in my mind
What if I had never let you go
Would you be the man I used to know
If I'd stayed
If you'd tried
If we could only turn back time but I guess we'll never know
Many roads to take
Some to joy
Some to heartache
Anyone can lose their way
And if I said that we could turn it back
Right back to the start
Would you take the chance and make the change
Do you think how it would have been sometimes
Do you pray that I'd never left your side
What if I had never let you go
Would you be the man I used to know
If I'd stayed
If you'd tried
If we could only turn back time but I guess we'll never know
If only we could turn the hands of time
If I could take it back would you still be mine
'Cause I tried but I had to draw the line
And still this question keeps on spinning in my mind
What if I had never let you go
Would you be the man I used know
What if I had never walked away
'Cause I still love you more than I can say
If I'd stayed
If you'd tried
If we could only turn back time but I guess we'll never know
We'll never know

i have never been so xin ku in my whole life before. i'm still deciding. how am i going out to work when i look like this?

i dun want to be a panda anymore! go away. rawr. didnt have enough slp everyday which resulted in me having dark rings! wah. cant slp cant eat. whats happening to me. stay strong!

sujatha, valerie, kunyuan, eileen tay!!, siling and chai shia: thanks for staying by my side. and to the first three ppl thanks for coming all the way to make sure that i'm okie.

he promise neber to leave me alone even in the rain. it's on o7o6o6. although i miss the 060606 by 26min, he promise it on 12.26am. i noe he wont break his promise de. i miss you.and i really do. i dunno what's love.but you gave me an idea.it felt so good being love by someone.and especially by you.we will always live and neber separate. i love you. [you once promised me that but it's over now]

haix. yuan lai nan ren shi bu neng yi kao de. so many things have happen. why shld i wait for him. cant i just walk away after waiting for 15min. why shld i still wait for half an hour or even one hr? why shld i? mayb i love him too much to even dare walk away. i will wait no matter how long de. i promise. mayb eileen is right. i shld just walk away and not let him have his own way. but that's me. i'm too xin ruan. neber will i walk away. let him be bahx. at least i noe that's the real him. dun angry okay eileen. hahas. i noe you beri sad. dun ever regret letting me noe him. afterall it's my choice. [i still let you go]

zuo zai ni de sheng bian shi zhong man zhu de ti yankan ni kan de hua mianguo ni guo de shi jiantian ye qing le, hua ye kai leshui ran ni bu suo hua que yi qian yan wan yufen fen miao miao xian de zhen guizi you ni neng ge wo ze zhong gan jueyou ni pei ze jiu xing lewo ai ni.

never be replaced.
baby i love you and i'll never let you go
but if i have to boy i think that you shld noe.
all the love we make can never be erase
and i promise you that you will never be replaced.
i love you, yes i do
i'll be with you as long as you want me to.
until the end of time
from the day i met you i noe we'll be together
and now i noe i wanna be with you forever.
i wanna marry you and i wanna have your kids
thinking never compare to feel enough to kisses
i can say i'm truely happy to the same
you've make me think i'll die and live my life hesitate
there's never been no doubt in my mind
that i'll regret having you by my side.
but if the day comes that i'll have to let you go
i think that something i should probably let you know
with everything that i spent with you
then i will you coz i'm happy that i have you at all.
i will never ever leave you. believe me. until you let go of me, i'll never let go of you.

you add colours to my life. from this moment, i'll treasure every bits and pieces of you. this i promise you. i'll treasure all the happy moments that you gave me. those sad moments that you gave me, i'll treasure them more. coz only you can make me cry.''one day, if you need me and there are 1oo steps between us. you take the first step to get near me. i will take all the 99 steps to be there for you. just rmb that i still care for you.' do you really rmb what you told me. dear i miss you. i'll neber ever let go of you. i really have no faith in myself. i shall neber give you up. i still love you as much as before. even if you let go of me, i'll still hold on tight to you. neber will i let go. [i cant do that anymore]

As i sit and daydreamI can see you in my mind. I wonder when i can be yoursreally in the heartI love you deep down in my heart.are we drifting further and further away? i dun wanna lose you. i say it's all ok and everything is fine. but i hold a secret, behind this crooked smile. i'm not alright. i'm hurting too badly to understand, acting like i'm happy and putting on an act. being watched day by day knowing the pressure is worse i feel like i have to mess up just to feel normal. sometimes i just don't want to be here. i sometimes wish i could close my eyes and everything would be better and there would be no more reasons to cry i know if i run, my heart will break more. no matter how much i try to cover it up, it will hurt worse than it did before. how can i trust that if i turn to you, my pain will be healed. can i know i will be alright and can i know that you will be my shield. i'm not alright and i don't want to live my life hiding and pretending i'm just fine when the truth is i'm dying inside. what a grand thing to be loved.

love has crumbled this month. lovers separating. though some old flames rekindle but it's depressing enough.months of love and "poof" everything's gone. they love their guys yet the guys doesn't appreciate it. why go into love when you say you're not suitable not ready not confident.all these are just excuses

MissYouLikeCrazy I miss you like the sky misses the birds. I miss you like a song without the words. And everyday away from you it hurts. Cause I'm missing you like crazy. I miss you like the sun misses the day. I need you like the desert that needs the rain. And baby it's driving me insane. Cause I'm missing you like crazy. I'm missing you like crazy. Sitting here, thinking' bout how much you. You mean to me, you're my love, my baby. You're my friend my honey. What we got can't be replaced. I see no one, taking ya space. Anywhere you take me I'll follow. Cause every time I gotta go, I look into your eyes and then I know. You'll be waiting for me, And no matter how long that may be. I know that you are always there for me. Oh baby, I can't wait until I have you here. Sometimes at night I get it bad. I think about the times we share. So I rush to call you hoping you miss me too. The special way you say my name. You soothe my heart, make it ok You’re not here so I hold my pillow. Cause every time I gotta go, I look into your eyes and then I know You'll be waiting for me, And no matter how long that may be. I know that you are always there for me. Oh baby, I can't wait until I have you here. Baby, I'm missing you like crazy. And I'm hoping that you miss me too. I'm missing you like crazy.

i'm sorry i made you felt useless. but you broke your promise. you promise to protect me and neber hurt me anymore. but you broke it by saying all those. it hurts. it really does. my tears keep rolling down. but i aint sad. it just keep rolling. i wipe it away it falls again. but at least i neber go out into the rain to cry. bcoz i promise you i will neber walk in the rain anymore. [i broke my promise]

Nobody but me, could know the way I feel

And I wish I could be stronger

No longer afraid

thanks for hugging me so tight and long ytd night. i'm sorry i broke the promise and cried. i cant help it. i am so sad. i miss you so. i am afraid to lose you. but i am glad that you say you will hold me tight like you do ytd. i love you. [no more hugs for me]

WEE THEORY BOOK:never say die before you try.pick yourself up when you fall.every fall shall be a stepping stone.we are the ones to create.when there's will, there's always hope. if you want, you will.having a little confidencce does not hurt.try as you might, it does not cost you a penny.keep trying, the river will not stop flowing for you.people cant always be perfect, forgive the imperfectness &learn to appreciate the weaker part of it.if you can forget those unhappy things, you are a truely happy person.i will try and memorise everything. i promise.

forget about prefection, aim for improvement.
failure is not an end, failure is just a beginning.
love myself! i cant accept anyone else as who they are,
unless i accept myself for who i am.
love cure two ppl, the one who gave and the one who received it.

want you to know who I really am.
I never thought I'd feel this way towards you.
And if you ever need someone to come along,
I will follow you, and keep you strong.

in my heart i'm so broken, can you see it

the pain is killing me slowly

i don't think you can heal it

i will kill myself slowlyto remove the pain

I don't know why i miss you so much.
You left me with nothing,
nothing but the question Why.
Your face,your voice,your smile,your laughter,your touch.
I'm missing it.
I'm missing you

Because I'll never let this go
But I can't find the words to tell you
I don't want to be alone
But now I feel like I don't know you

I never know what the future brings
But I know you are here with me now
We’ll make it through
And I hope you are the one
I share my life with

Trying not to reach out
But when I'd try to speak out
Felt like no one could hear me
Wanted to belong here
But something felt so wrong here
So I pray
I could breakaway we were on the verge of losing it.
but we got it back again.
no one can take it,
no one can break it.
i've learn to cherish it
and i will forever.
that's when we belong together.
that's our LOVE.

The reason you never cross my mind is because you're always on my mind.The reason why I don't like you is because I love you.The reason I don't want you is because I need you.The reason I wouldn't cry if you left is because I would die if you left.The reason I wouldn't live for you is because I would die for you.The reason why I'm not willing to do anything for you is because I would do everything foryou.The reason I chose my lifeis because YOU ARE MY LIFE.

i believe i believe in love and like the stars above they shine, let it shine over me. set me free i believe in you and that our love is true ohh i believe i believe.

I'm staring at the glass in front of me,
Is it half empty of our wins or of all you've given me.
I know I've been selfish,
I know I've been foolish,
But look through that
& You will see,
I'll do better, I know,
Baby, I can do better.

What would you say
if I asked you not to go
To forget everyone, forget everything
and start over with me
Would you take my hand and never let me go
Promise me you'll never let me go

although we have come so far, i know you held on so tight until you are numb and tired. i'm sorry. i hope history will not repeat itself again because i do not have the strength too. i have tried my best. i thought you will be happy without me but i guess it's otherwise. i want to set you free but you gave that chance away. that's why i want to work hard with you to overcome this. everything will be over soon. i love you. [you are free]

it's all from my previous posts. our memories.

我知道故事不会太曲折 我总会遇见一个什么人 陪我过没有了她的人生 成家立业之类的等等 她做了她觉得对的选择 我只好祝福她真的对了 爱不到我最想要爱的人 谁还能要我怎样呢 我爱的人不是我的爱人 她心里每一寸都属于另一个人 她真幸福幸福得真残忍 让我又爱又恨她的爱怎么那么深 我爱的人她已有了爱人 从他们的眼神说明了我不可能 每当听见她或他说「我们」 就像听见爱情永恒的嘲笑声

Say Goodnight　晚安　谢谢你陪我一整个夜晚 Close your eyes, be quiet　我明白你有自己的不安很多来不及我不曾看见　我只遇见你的现在不管你接受或离开　I hope to stay for a while 除此之外　要你明白　你的笑我真是喜欢看于是我一次又一次等待　其实都还算愉快除此之外　非常遗憾　你的心我还是打不开 And if you need somebody　我确定我会在　不会走开 So Goodbye　晚安　舍不得看你觉得不自在 It's alright, I'm fine　看起来　这故事会写不完很多差一点你没有发现　你只认识我的现不管你留下或走开　I'm gonna stay for a while 除此之外　我要你明白　你的笑我真是喜欢看于是我一次又一次等待　其实都还算愉快除此之外　非常遗憾　你的心我还是打不开 And if you need somebody　我确定我会在除此之外　我还在等待　你的心将为我敞开 But if you need somebody　你知道我会在　不会走开　不会走开 [you once sang this song for me to sleep]

you were the first. the first guy i hug. the first guy i hold hands with. the first guy whom i cook for. you were my many first. but everything had to end. i noe i'm not a good person i have my own faults. but who doesnt? if you ask me i would say you oso have many faults. but it's useless to say whose faults it is because everything had ended. don't be sad because it's over, be happy because it once happened. i'm really happy you were mine once. i am so scare of lonely. so scare of being alone now. afterall you were by my side for the past 1year and 9months. it's hard but i hope it will be over soon. i will be going to places that we had gone before. with nobody but myself.

在我们的故事 写下结局前

请你聆听最后尾奏 的音乐

幸福渐远 心跳渐弱

回音在休止符后停留了 好久

当每一个当下 变成过去后

自由也许是离人们 的折磨

在狂欢时寂寞 从绝望里复活 才明白

爱会随时间 逐渐成熟

从那一天 原谅你的瞬间

我不过情人节

我和未来 不再相恋

爱断了线 于是我每天都 过想你的离人节

不再见面 不代表我 不再对你想念

你是曾经的永远 会永远 在我身边

从那一天 放开你的瞬间

我不过情人节 除非未来

还会出现 爱断了线

我如何能不再 过想你的离人节

希望这是 最后一次 向最爱说再见

也希望下个永远 会永远 在我身边

it all ended on our 21st mth anniversary.

i really need more time to think carefully. although really wan to see you so much but i need to stay away from you for awhile. sorry. you say dun wan me change but i noe you dun mean it de. who dun wan a perfect girlfriend. its hard but we will get over it soon. really so hard. finally one day has passed.

why do all the shows that i see on tv have wonderful endings?

does it even occur in real life?

why don't you let me go?

i never wanted anything. take it or leave.

what hurts the most is being so close. you left even without telling me. you never even tell me you go there do what when come back. am i not important to you anymore? am i still in your heart? why have all these become liddat? is it because of me. then i'm sorry. coz i really dunno why. what you said really makes me think alot. probably what you said is all true. probably i really make you so irritated. probably. probably you really want to leave me. i also dunno what to say. coz i dun have the right to say anything. tell me what to do. it really hurts so much that i cant tell.