why is everything going wrong again? ytd dreamt that i went out with my parents and he went too. coz our parents are friends. so happy. but when i woke up at 4plus am i realised everything is just a dream. i dunno whats happening to me nowadays. well but i am sure that the once-so -crazy michel is gone. gone forever. i have been talking lesser and lesser everyday. mayb there will be a day when i bcm mute. den there will be peace. coz ppl wont say: michel you are so noisy. is it fair for me too? all these that happened isnt what we wan. it unfair to you does that mean it's fair to me? everything i did is just wrong. everything i did ppl just dun like it, everything i do just dun get accepted by them. what have i done wrong? ytd think le whole night. mayb i shld just disappear into thin air. by then i doubt ppl will notice i'm gone. why shldnt they. my parents can easily put me by the road side and forget bout me. so ppl can too. ppl doesnt need me. in band got jj and yy is enough. in sch i dun even matter to my friends. at hm i definitely dun need to be here. i only noe how to cry cry cry. can that solve any prob. i am such an idiot.

Michel Ang, you suck totally.

LOSER.

haix. it suck! i feel so low today.

but i noe how to do dh/dx! woots. i was thinking for so long and i finally tot of the ans. whatever. even if i noe how to do so what? still fail mah. first question jiu dunno how to do le. how dumb can i be?

i'm sorry for everything!

I today went to work. Sian. Andy was there too. Idiotic. He went there my uncle still call me go. But at 5plus downstairs a lot ppl so we close upstairs and went down to help. I got thirty30 bucks for working five5 hours. But I hate the money. It made me lost the ring. I am so useless. Can lost the ring that baby buy. I feel so bad!! I’m sorry darling. I hope we wont separate just bcoz I lost the ring. I miss you so! how can i be so careless?? i lost an impt thing just b4 mew yr. haix.

HAPPY NEW YEAR!

i seriously gave up on everything. why must everyone treat me liddat? whats going on in this world??? i wanna grow up. either this or i bcm a baby again.

bitter fifteen15.

I am so damn angry!! My new yr clothes are ruin! So idiotic can. Stupid dye. RAWR! Today I made a whole plate of pineapple tarts myself. Aint I great? Hahas. I feel so good. Although it is beri ugly I feel so proud of myself. Hahas. but nice to eat can le. LOL. My first valentine with him. I made him angry again bcoz of some stupid stuffs. Am I in the wrong? I dunno. Whatever it is, it’s over again. How I hope he can dun get angry so easily. But i dun think can bahx. Coz I always say stupid things make him angry with me. I will learn to grow up de.
Liying seems to get on beri well without bin kor. Well, he isn’t coping beri well with it. Afterall three3 yr of relationship isn’t so easy to forget. But she alrdy has a new bf le. So mfast right. Haix. One moment kor was so happy the nxt he was crying. It’s been so long alrdy. Why must she keep appearing in his life making him so miserable. He is still crazy over her. Buying all those things related to elephants. Even making the pineapple tarts he made the shape of elephants. Haix. I dunno how to help him le. i give up.

i couldnt slp!! slept for three3 hr den suddenly wake up. sian. mr khoo msg me this morning. i seriously hope i have not lost all my faith bahx. i will continue to strive hard de. yay!! mxt friday i think going out with him to lunch. i hope everyone go lor!!

happy 11th baby! i miss you so much!!!! woots.

i got a B3 for my chi Os. it isnt what i wan. i guess i just didnt put in effort bahx. just like what ms lee said. i am glad that almost all get distinctions. i seriously disappoint mr khoo bahx. he put in so much effort and hide behind mountains and mountains of test papers yet i get this kind of result. such a failure. i am a failure in everything. cant even get my position right? what am i actually? just someone who gets ordered around doing what ppl dun wan do. i dun give a damn if i dun get in. i wanna give up. today see mr khoo felt so sad. felt like i can neber face him again. but he makes me understand that from today onwards i must study hard. i will. i promise. he told us how was he doing in the new sch. so happy to noe that he preferred hsc. coz there's a bunch o flovely and lively kids waiting for him!! ((; i will definitely invite him to our wedding if we really did get married. hahas xDD

i broke down again when i see her today. i feel so bad for not helping her to fight. i'm sorry. i have caused so much unhappiness for them. but i am glad to know that everyone is on my side. but the two2 of them against all of us is enough le. they sure win de. haix. i'm having a headache! damn pain can. shu hui is just beside me! xD we doing f&n proj. and we are the one who is right at the back of the lab. two2 of us messing around with the papers and printer. so dumb! ((;
and i printed 14pages of my work!! i am so proud. but the last ten10 pages are filled up by three3 tables. shuhui say ms lee surely wont accept my work de. oohhh. i dun care le! at least i did sth.

i really broke down today. i dun feel that they need me anymore. why shld they? they can discuss between them if a prob crops up. they dun even need to ask me. what she says counts. she is bigger den me. why even bother to ask me when you have alrdy decided? and you dun look like you are guilty. you have definitely wrote the wrong names on the paper. she isnt the one whose attendence is poor. you noe how sad i was when i noe they are going to take those whose attendence are poor out of SYF?

56days and i'm free.

ps. i tried to help alrdy. but there is nth i can do now. i'm sorry.

take care baby. i cant be there to take care of you when you are sick.

omg!! friday is coming le. i am so scare. and mr khoo is going to be so disappointed. i haben hand in my holiday hmwk. bleah.

ginko is so cute!!!

the dumb eileen rmb my sixth day after she read my blog. isnt she dumb? i love no. 6 cannot meh? still got reason de? just like her. who will go like no. 7? hahas. well i did have lunch with her today in sch lor. hahas. xD

so tired. my hmwk are piling higher and higher everyday. when will i finish them? eileen is so jealous!! wahaha xD coz i dun have time to pei her now after sch. well eileen, you go negotiate with him bahx. LOL. i am so scare to see friday come. that determine whether i can carry on with hmt not. and the band going to go up to the hall at 2pm to support those who are getting the result. so cool. i pray.

HAPPY 6TH DAY!!

only i rmb.

it's such a humiliation to be taught by you. cant you let me practise myself? fine, you get your own way. am i stupid or what? why should i doubt her? she wont do this to me de. i believe her. i am so dumb. just now go tuition open the dorr den bang the stupid door. pain leh. jmy and fis friends laugh until can die. so embarassed! xD

am i seriously so bad? i guess so bahx. at least i seriously noe he is really way better den me. but i just cant take out the energy to blow properly. everytime i step into the room i bcm depress. there just isnt anything to motivate me. why must they talk behind my back? want say tell me directly la. why must pass to so many ppl? i have alrdy tried my best. must you force me till liddat? anyway the world will not stop evolving just bcoz i am not there.
my dearest eileen: i helped you advertise leh. so good right?

There's a TPJC Alumni Band Concert on 24 March at the TPJC auditorium

Theme will be on "Animations Graffiti"

Most Disney pieces will be played.

who wanna go with me??
7bucks!! interested de go find eileen!!

thanks eileen!! i will smile ((: dun worry for me. bcoz i noe i cant hold on any longer.

i didnt get to see you.
rest in peace.